something has changed in the electrical current of the universe...something like those 3 words being spoken sent a wave through the ether, redirecting some bizarre attention my way. what is today? why am i suddenly in hot pursuit? it really is as though they all knew - they all got the signal, 'she's in love, time to start the challenge.' well guess what world: i AM in love, in a way that i thought i couldn't be again. and i'm not going to sacrifice it for anything. this is the best chance i've ever had for happiness, and i'm taking it as far as it'll go.
so bob is jealous that we never had a romantic relationship...
so MB will never have a shot with me...
so tim is regretting his greatest mistake...
marty loves me. and i love marty.
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Monday, March 19, 2007
Intro
This past year of my life has been defined by change. At one time, I knew where I was, where I was headed, and how I was going to get there. Then everything I knew was gone. And it was strange how it got to that point, because it's not like it was entirely out of thin air, though in many ways it was. It was a lot of promises that were made half-heartedly and then were broken haphazardly. It was lies that were denied and later were found to be truths. And it was odd circumstances - thinking that I knew what to expect when really all I could expect was the unexpected.
Well, for as much as I mourned and lamented the life that I lost, I have finally been realizing the life that I gained. In being abandoned, I learned how to find my own way. And once I was able to let go, it was like there was a light shining on me where there had always been darkness. I realized that I had been held in a shadow for the longest time, and when I stepped out, the world was waiting for me with open arms. It is amazing, when you go from feeling like nothing to having people treat you like you are everything.
With all of this came the confidence to step out on my own; to remember what it was like to be me, for the stories to be mine. And the stories...oh how they returned. The experiences are mine, but the memories are for the world to share. Sit back, relax, laugh, cry, get angry...I've been through some crazy shit that's just too much to keep in this little brain of mine.
Well, for as much as I mourned and lamented the life that I lost, I have finally been realizing the life that I gained. In being abandoned, I learned how to find my own way. And once I was able to let go, it was like there was a light shining on me where there had always been darkness. I realized that I had been held in a shadow for the longest time, and when I stepped out, the world was waiting for me with open arms. It is amazing, when you go from feeling like nothing to having people treat you like you are everything.
With all of this came the confidence to step out on my own; to remember what it was like to be me, for the stories to be mine. And the stories...oh how they returned. The experiences are mine, but the memories are for the world to share. Sit back, relax, laugh, cry, get angry...I've been through some crazy shit that's just too much to keep in this little brain of mine.
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